Today was one of those moments where I had a what is my life moment. 

There was no real reason for it. I was sitting on a bench reading a book, a book about String theory so that probably what got me started on this train of thought, but I just stopped and looked up and had A Moment. Specifically after reading this,

“According to special relativity, no longer can space and time be thought of as universal concepts set in stone, experienced identically by everyone. Rather, space and time emerged from Einstein’s reworking as malleable constructs whose form and appearance depend on ones state of motion.”

That. depend on ones state of motion. 

What is my state of motion? A cloudless sky, I might as well be unmoving under it, sun in my face, feeling like a cat. How do you know if you are going forward in your life? Is there even forward, or is it just an idea? 

I thought about this past year of my life and how absurdly fast its gone by. How as we get older our state of motion, as it were, seems to speed up insurmountably. Suddenly I’ve graduated high school, graduated college, moved out, got a job. I look back and its almost just a blur of a memory that lasts a few seconds. Reduced to the snapshot pictures in my head, or on my camera. I think I’m moving forward. Or at least, in a direction that feels good. There are parts of my life I feel like I could be making weird choices in, but…it feels right….

I thought about another book I have read, Einstein’s Dreams, and the theories of time he talks about. Is he right? Can time be sticky? Can people get lost in it? Enter alternate universes until they’ve found their way back into their right one? Lose their path….How do I know I’m on my right one? How does anyone know?